And as I start another round of nightshift, I resume wondering what the hell I’m doing with my professional life…

Last night was a massive upgrade for me… instead of answering phones and checking Telstra circuits, I got to swap out encryptor boxes on bank interchange lines.

WOW! Now not only am I trained in the ways of being a tape monkey, but I can now unplug black boxes and replace them with other ones!

And as I’m driving home from shift, and then as I’m awoken at 4pm to the sounds of female laugher and general jocularity, I’m reminded that today is Melbourne Cup Day. A public holiday. Where almost everyone except me is unwinding, relaxing, celebrating life and not necessarily 20 odd horses running around a track.

It has the potential to bring a man to tears.

I’ve never actually even been to a Cup Day. Nobody has ever invited me, nor have I gone of my own accord. This year would be the first year ever that I didn’t even have a choice to go even if I were. I don’t like not having choices. In some respects I’m very much the type to fidget when trapped in a corner; although I don’t panic/freak out like most, I’m still affected.

To start off what yearns to be a great week (not), I lost my wallet on Sunday. I’ve lost my wallet only once ever. I think I lost it at Nandos — supposedly a customer found it, told the counter, then offered to drop it into the local cop shop, AND THE STUPID FUCKS ACTUALLY LET HIM WALK OUT THE STORE WITH IT.

Of course, I’ve heard nothing, and no cop shops in the area have heard anything about my wallet. I cannot believe the utter stupidity of the person working in the shop… do they have no standards on training and stuff anymore? I wonder if the joint burnt down if anyone would even know basic emergency procedures. How hard would it have been to insist they keep it, or at least take the persons details?

I didn’t lost much — maybe $40 odd. And four cards. That’s the annoying bit — I can’t get to my money. I have none. And thanks to the week being interluded with a public holiday, I probably won’t see any new cards until next week. Fucking ace.

As a side note, I was reminded that Sunday evening of the choice I’d made to drop someone in particular out of my life, and how much of a good decision that was (well, I get that a lot.) I cannot believe that one person can be such a fucking asshole, and still have friends, a job, and a certain someone still doting over him after all this time. Some people confuse me, needlessly and endlessly. I guess some people are so desperate for attention, love, or even a false sense of security that they’ll sell their souls and self-respect.

“We gotta get out of this place, if it’s the last thing we ever do…”

The Animals